Random Randomness Because there is no Time to Organize

A view of the volcano from Antigua.

As always, please excuse typos!

I made it to Guatemala!! Now that I'm finally sitting down to write I don't know where to start...
I must say unfortunately these blogs will be much less comical than Thailand since I have absolutely no time to myself and that’s when all the ridiculousness occurs. Every hour of every day is scheduled in PC. After the regular day there’s homework assignments so it’s hard to be funny while exhausted and on a schedule. lol Enjoy anyway.
Please realize up front that this will be total word vomit. It’s super difficult to find time to write.

Let’s begin:

LOVE Guatemala…the country is absolutely beautiful and everything is SO green. The people are super generous and friendly and always wanting to offer you something to eat or drink.
I suppose I'll share two stories about using the wrong language :
I was in an interview to assess my language skills and the man asked what I had been doing for the last few months. Not really knowing how to explain my work I ended up saying I was a “maestra de sexo” which means sex teacher. OMG What I MEANT to say was I was a sex-ed teacher. .... we laughed pretty hard about that one.
So I was sick one night with the runs and I dashed down the steps and into the bathroom only to find that there was no toilet tissue. Frantically running around the courtyard and in/out of the house, my madre (host mom) started running around too like, “What are we looking for!?” I didn’t know exactly how to say toilet paper so I ended up desperately shouting, “la cosa blanca!....necessito la cosa blanca! Donde esta?” Translation: "The white thing! I need the white thing! Where is it?”
So she ran around picking up everything white like we were on an episode of Sesame Street.
“Is it the toilet bowl cleaner?”
“Is it the white towel on the peg?”
“Is it the white bag nearby on the ground?”
I keep trying to do a rolling motion like I was unrolling paper and finally someone nearby blurted out “papel de toilet!” I was like, are you serious! It’s the same dang thing! The story has a happy ending, I didn’t soil myself and now everyone laughs and asks me if the bathroom has “la cosa blanca”.

One of the many Catholic cathedrals in Antigua.

Oh also, please take note and don’t be alarmed if I repeatedly reference diarrhea. I’m pretty sure we’ve heard the word no less than 20 times a day since coming here. It’s commonplace to talk about poop amongst volunteers and we all regularly share with each other about how none of us is regular anymore (whether too much or too little). I know, I know...too much info, but honestly it’s our number one concern. On that note, I used to joke with the family that we should make a CD called “After Dinner Sounds” because everyone is always releasing some sort of something into the atmosphere but I tell you....being here in Guatemala has brought totally new meaning to “After Dinner Sounds.” For one, often the toilet is “outside” more or less with a door made or metal or corn stalks that look like bamboo and if anyone is nearby, EVERYONE can tell exactly how things are settling in your stomach (or not). Also, I don’t think I’ve ever heard stomach gurgling like this before in all my life (in myself or other people). It sounds like there are a bunch of children jumping on a waterbed. Gotta love it.

A close up of the intricacies of the cathedral.

Also interesting, I had my first bucket bath! It’s not as hard to get used to as you might imagine. What IS hard to get used to is throwing toilet paper in a trashcan instead of putting it in the toilet. I must confess I spent much of the first few days squealing and plucking at toilet paper that I forgot to throw in the trash. Gross : /
LOVE the food of course...I don’t know if it’s good grammar in Spanish or if it’s even a phrase, but whenever anyone worries if I like the food, I always say something like,” Don’t worry, if you can eat it, I like it! Cook whatever you want : )
FAVORITES: pepiyan-a Guatemalan specific dish with chicken, yucca, potatoes, onions and other vegetables in a delicious sauce over rice. Fried bananas-usually for breakfast, they are a delightfully sweet treat with my beans and eggs. Huevos a la rancheras-OMG I don’t know what they use to make that salsa but I could eat these medium cooked eggs smothered in salsa for every meal.
So Guatemalans love chow mein. We had some last week with….get this…salsa ketchup from the local fried chicken joint. AMAZING! I was skeptical but am now a firm believer in the magic of noodles and salsa ketchup.