More Randomness

A beautiful view of Antigua and one of its volcanos.

Other interesting adventures and quotes:
So we went to visit my aunt (my madre’s sister) down the street. In Guatemala everyone is very hospitable and generous and before too long, someone is offering you banana’s and honey or orange juice or cookies. Now, their homemade lemonade/orange/papaya/pick any fruit juice is AMAZING and completely made from scratch. However….we have to drink things made of “agua pura"= pure water...and not everyone has boiled water on-hand or uses the bottled water service. The kitchen sink is filled with water that comes from I’m not sure where and flows into a large waist high concrete square container called a pila. So auntie’s children emerge from the kitchen with purple drink and I’m like, “DANG, how am I supposed to ask if this is pure water?” I’ve only been here six days and I have no idea if I will be socially shunned or stoned to death for being the jerk that asks if the water is purified. So I said nothing but imagine the kids scooping pila water into my cup and throwin in some grape flavor, giving it a stir and putting it in my hand. Having just gotten over five days of vigorous gastrointestinal….cleansing, I was not too keen on drinking my juice. I politely took a sip and held the rest in my lap until I proceed to spill half of it on my skirt. Now everyone’s giving me the stank eye and my madre says, “That’s why you should just drink it.” I managed to escape having a parasite in my small intestine by insisting that we share. Phew….that was a close call!

A view of the old capital in Antigua.

So I think this story is hilarious. A little too much info, but necessary to explain one of my “favorite” experiences. So one night I was really sick. I swear I spent no less than three hours on the toilet poopping out everything in both intestines. But it wasn’t enough. Something wasn’t right and I wasn’t feeling any better. The whole night as I trudged up and down the stairs over and over and over and over and over again, all I could keep thinking was, “UGGGGHHH I wish I could just throw up. I know I’d feel better if I just threw up.” So finally somewhere near 5 am after another trip to the bathroom, I ‘m standing there washing my hands, standing like the hunchback of notre dame, looking and feeling pathetic and thinking for the millionth time about blowing chunks. “I wish I could just…. BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH….BLAAAAAAAAAAAAH……BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.” I promise you in the middle of saying that it really happened! It was strange because I started laughing. I wish I could have seen myself, throwing up my guts and laughing at 5 am.

So the moral of the story? When you wish upon a star, makes no difference who you are...your dreams really can come true : ) I know you probably don’t care and wish I hadn’t told you, but this is also my diary, so you’ll have to deal. lol

Another funny story from a fellow PC trainee:
So one lady’s madre is always falling asleep at the table during dinner. That night, as everyone was making fun of the madre for not finishing her dinner before passing out, my friend taught her family how to say “wake up” in English. So everyone gets really quiet and she shouts “WAKE UP!” However… wake up sounds a lot like hueco. Hueco means queer in Spanish. My friend explained to us that not only did she feel like a jerk for shouting at her mom and waking her up, but she also called her queer. LOL

Some of my host family: Chico (22), Don Tereso, Me, Dona Mira.

Random side note: I was on the bus that dropped me off in the campo/country and I had to walk to the plaza where my house it and I wasn’t sure which way to go. But as luck would have it, the young drunk was passed out on his corner (there’s on old drunk on another corner) and I knew I was close to home! Que suerte no? How lucky!

Lastly, Guatemala is SO LOUD! Seriously one morning I woke up early to have my Bible study and do some homework. I kid you not, at 5:45 am host brother is BLARING Christian salsa music. I mean it’s so loud my floor and walls are shaking. The funniest part, when I went for my bathroom break at 6:30, madre says, “What are you doing up so early?” I’m like, SERIOUSLY! If I hadn’t set my alarm the gallos/roosters off-pitched squalling would have roused my by 5:30 and then of course there’s the vibrating of my walls and floor. I died laughing inside! Oh and sometimes those gallos are confused because they start singing at 10:30…..pm. And I can’t forget the dogs, who, from all across the pueblo, spontaneously raise their voices in a midnight anthem. It’s so much more interesting than in the states, where everything is calm and mostly predictable.

Guatemala is full of bright colors!

Last random thought: I’m pretty sure my uterus has been permanently dislodged from its God-given location. In Guatemala, old school American school buses are the local transportation….. CRAZY drivers + cobblestone + pedestrians and motos/motorcycles all over the place + constant horn honking = jarred uterus, arm sandwiches with the people on either side and bruises on my knees because I’m technically a giant in Guatemala and don’t fit in the seats. What an adventure every day!!
Ok that’s it….until next week : )

Random Randomness Because there is no Time to Organize

A view of the volcano from Antigua.

As always, please excuse typos!

I made it to Guatemala!! Now that I'm finally sitting down to write I don't know where to start...
I must say unfortunately these blogs will be much less comical than Thailand since I have absolutely no time to myself and that’s when all the ridiculousness occurs. Every hour of every day is scheduled in PC. After the regular day there’s homework assignments so it’s hard to be funny while exhausted and on a schedule. lol Enjoy anyway.
Please realize up front that this will be total word vomit. It’s super difficult to find time to write.

Let’s begin:

LOVE Guatemala…the country is absolutely beautiful and everything is SO green. The people are super generous and friendly and always wanting to offer you something to eat or drink.
I suppose I'll share two stories about using the wrong language :
I was in an interview to assess my language skills and the man asked what I had been doing for the last few months. Not really knowing how to explain my work I ended up saying I was a “maestra de sexo” which means sex teacher. OMG What I MEANT to say was I was a sex-ed teacher. .... we laughed pretty hard about that one.
So I was sick one night with the runs and I dashed down the steps and into the bathroom only to find that there was no toilet tissue. Frantically running around the courtyard and in/out of the house, my madre (host mom) started running around too like, “What are we looking for!?” I didn’t know exactly how to say toilet paper so I ended up desperately shouting, “la cosa blanca!....necessito la cosa blanca! Donde esta?” Translation: "The white thing! I need the white thing! Where is it?”
So she ran around picking up everything white like we were on an episode of Sesame Street.
“Is it the toilet bowl cleaner?”
“Is it the white towel on the peg?”
“Is it the white bag nearby on the ground?”
I keep trying to do a rolling motion like I was unrolling paper and finally someone nearby blurted out “papel de toilet!” I was like, are you serious! It’s the same dang thing! The story has a happy ending, I didn’t soil myself and now everyone laughs and asks me if the bathroom has “la cosa blanca”.

One of the many Catholic cathedrals in Antigua.

Oh also, please take note and don’t be alarmed if I repeatedly reference diarrhea. I’m pretty sure we’ve heard the word no less than 20 times a day since coming here. It’s commonplace to talk about poop amongst volunteers and we all regularly share with each other about how none of us is regular anymore (whether too much or too little). I know, I know...too much info, but honestly it’s our number one concern. On that note, I used to joke with the family that we should make a CD called “After Dinner Sounds” because everyone is always releasing some sort of something into the atmosphere but I tell you....being here in Guatemala has brought totally new meaning to “After Dinner Sounds.” For one, often the toilet is “outside” more or less with a door made or metal or corn stalks that look like bamboo and if anyone is nearby, EVERYONE can tell exactly how things are settling in your stomach (or not). Also, I don’t think I’ve ever heard stomach gurgling like this before in all my life (in myself or other people). It sounds like there are a bunch of children jumping on a waterbed. Gotta love it.

A close up of the intricacies of the cathedral.

Also interesting, I had my first bucket bath! It’s not as hard to get used to as you might imagine. What IS hard to get used to is throwing toilet paper in a trashcan instead of putting it in the toilet. I must confess I spent much of the first few days squealing and plucking at toilet paper that I forgot to throw in the trash. Gross : /
LOVE the food of course...I don’t know if it’s good grammar in Spanish or if it’s even a phrase, but whenever anyone worries if I like the food, I always say something like,” Don’t worry, if you can eat it, I like it! Cook whatever you want : )
FAVORITES: pepiyan-a Guatemalan specific dish with chicken, yucca, potatoes, onions and other vegetables in a delicious sauce over rice. Fried bananas-usually for breakfast, they are a delightfully sweet treat with my beans and eggs. Huevos a la rancheras-OMG I don’t know what they use to make that salsa but I could eat these medium cooked eggs smothered in salsa for every meal.
So Guatemalans love chow mein. We had some last week with….get this…salsa ketchup from the local fried chicken joint. AMAZING! I was skeptical but am now a firm believer in the magic of noodles and salsa ketchup.

Before I Set Off

(don't mind any typos)

It's 4:44 a.m. and I've been preparing for my adventure in Guatemala for weeks now. (Let me tell ya, it wasn't all fun and games....actually, there weren't any fun and games, just paperwork, hoops to jump through, bills and house cleaning. I'm not up because of adrenaline that's for sure.
I suppose I value writing about my pre-departure mood/attitude more than I do sleeping in my bed one last time--it's ok, my bed and I have an abundance of memories of snoozes past.)

I suppose I should feel excited, but honestly...I don't. Perhaps when I step off the plane or eat my first Guatemalan meal I'll feel it. I think I'm still waiting to speak those first words in Spanish or to meet my fellow Peace Corps Volunteers....Up until that moment, Peace Corps (PC) is just an opportunity on the horizon--not yet something that is actually happening to me.

So why am I going?

The really, really, really short version: ever since I had my first original thought as a person I knew my life would be spent outside the U.S. It just isn't for me. (I do expect to finish my service with a better appreciation for the United States after two years on the outside however : ) I suppose my hope in going into the PC is that work and experiences in Guatemala will show me what type of education I need to pursue in order to be "useful." Right now that could be anything from law school to med school to international policy or relations. Clearly I need some help narrowing it down! Hopefully time in the PC will help me determine what area (medicine, economics, policy, etc) has major needs and give me ideas for how to get an education and resources to fill that specific type of need.

At the same time, I almost feel like a little kid at the doctor's office, wincing and looking away as the nurse prepares to stick the needle in my arm...just waiting. I know my idealistic (and some might say naive) outlook has to be normalized at some point, but waiting to figure out just how it will happen and what it will feel like..... Well, it's necessary but not something I'm looking forward to.

But that's slightly depressing. Let's talk about what there is to look forward to!
going on an iguana hunt
eating iguana
saying embarrassing things due to ill placed or incorrectly translated words in Spanish
getting a cat or dog
hiking a volcano
learning how to sew/weave
setting up my own house
learning a new language
seeing what kind of electricity exists in my town
watching myself try to stay out of a fight the first time someone treats me like an inferior little woman
being a giant
getting some new jewelry
making new friends
things being cheaper lol


Just in case you were wondering, here's what the next 6 months will look like-
Jan 4-5th Orientation with other PCVs (Peace Corps Volunteers) in D.C.
Jan 6th Leave for Guatemala!
January-March Language, culture and job training for three months in Santa Lucia Milpas Altas (between Antigua and Guatemala City, elevation 7000 ft!) For these three months I'll be living with a host family.
End of March -I'll find out where my permanent placement is in Guatemala and move there. Again, I'll live with a host family for three months.
May-I'll be able to find my own housing, whether that's with another family or by myself or with another volunteer or a local...who can know : )


In March I'll be able to start my job!!

So these are my introductory, pre-departure feelings and a bit of information.
I'm sure future posts will have more exciting content!